Taming the Tongue
James 3:1-17
Anger is not a sin. Anger is a God-given emotion. However, like any God-given gift, anger can be misused as a weapon. But where does this kind of weaponized anger come from? When I cross reference scripture and psychology, I am led to the following conclusion: Anger is unresolved fear, rooted in pride, that has grown out of control in the soul (mind, will and emotions), manifesting itself through hostile thoughts, words, and actions. When I experience the wrong kind of anger, it is most often rooted in the fear of rejection.
What if someone else makes me angry? The presupposition to this commonly asked question is false, because it assumes that others control my emotions. Only I have control over my emotions, and while some emotions may seem to form involuntary, I am responsible for engaging my mind and will to determine how I will think, speak, and act based on those emotions. This is why James references the Psalmist when he encourages us to “Be angry, yet do not sin” (Ephesians 4:26-27; Psalm 4:4).
What’s in your wallet cup? I had the immense privilege of serving under the mentorship of Pastor James at Free Chapel. During one of our sessions, he taught me a profound and challenging lesson about anger and offense. The first question of the lesson was, what happens when someone “bumps my cup?”
As earthen vessels, we all represent different kinds of cups because we all have the capacity to be full of something (2 Corinthians 4:7). When someone “bumps my cup” through offense, whether intentionally or not, I tend to spill a little of that something. The misconception is to assume that the person who bumped my cup is responsible for whatever comes out. However, Jesus teaches us that, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45). In other words, whatever comes out was already there to begin with.
Therefore, the answer is to ask God to fill me with His wisdom, which is “first of all pure, then peace-loving, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap the fruit of righteousness” (James 3:17-18).
It’s OK to be angry. In fact, the right kind of anger can be a clue as to my God-given assignment here on earth. Jesus was the best example of having righteous anger when he forcefully removed the marketeers from the temple in John 2:13-16. Scripture suggests that when Jesus saw the hellacious activity, He was consumed with zeal for the house of God (John 2:17). However, instead of reacting to the situation by immediately exploding, He paused before communicating His thoughts and feelings. Scripture tells us that before he expressed Himself, He took the time to braid a whip (John 2:15).
It’s Not Too Late to Whip It. Whip It Good. I have a unique perspective about this occurrence in scripture because of my experience in whipmaking. One of my previous business ventures included the importing and distribution of hunting, camping and survival gear, which included a wide variety of professional whips. Depending on the length and material used, a proper whip can take at least several hours to braid.
The coolest part about whips is that you don’t need to strike anything directly in order for them to be effective. When used correctly, the crack of a whip will break the sound barrier, creating a sonic boom. The Bible never says that Jesus struck anyone, and with the aid of a whip, He didn’t have to.
Similarly, stun guns are often considered the safest and most effective weapon for deterring criminal activity. This is due to the loud cracking noise they make. Studies have show that criminals are far more likely to disengage when they hear the sound of a stun gun, than when confronted by any other weapon of self defense.
All of these facts, when taken in context with scripture, speak volumes about the patience Jesus exercised while feeling emotional about the situation. He exemplified emotional intelligence and maturity by preemptively taking the time to consider his thoughts, words, and actions. In doing so, He was fully participating with His Heavenly Father in fulfilling part of His earthly mission to the church by establishing His authority as The Great Mediator between God and man (1 Timothy 2:5) and setting the stage with a foreshadowing of His soon coming death, burial, and resurrection (John 2:18-19).
Here is the point: Righteous indignation transforms grief into zeal, allowing for anger to be used in partnership with the Holy Spirit as a powerful scouring agent against sin and separation.
Swim at your own risk. While watching a recent news report, I was shocked to discover that a young man was diagnosed with a flesh-eating disease after swimming in an estuary while on vacation. “An estuary is a partially enclosed, coastal water body where freshwater from rivers and streams mixes with salt water from the ocean. Estuaries, and their surrounding lands, are places of transition from land to sea” (epa.gov). When fresh and saltwater mix, it creates brackish water, which is a breeding ground for a microorganism called vibrio vulnificus, a flesh eating bacteria.
This revelation brings not only figurative, but literal meaning to what James meant when he said, “Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, this should not be! Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?” (James 3:10-11). Literally speaking, “Chronic (long-term) anger has been linked to health issues such as high blood pressure, heart problems, headaches, skin disorders, and digestive problems” (WebMD).
Forgiveness is the answer. Anger and unforgiveness are often traveling companions, so Beware the Traveler. When we hold onto unforgiveness, we become like brackish water, a breeding ground for parasitical thought patterns, resulting in the deterioration of our body, soul, and spirit. Left untreated and “bumped,” this dangerous mixture can spill over and onto the body of Christ (the church), negatively affecting and potentially spreading to those with whom we have influence.
Jesus delivered a sobering parable in Matthew 18:21-35 when He warned us that our Heavenly Father will hand us over to the enemy for torture and torment if we do not forgive each other from the heart. I know what it is like to feel tormented, but when I understand the truth of God’s Word, I realize that it is an avoidable, self-inflicted injury.
Forgiveness from the heart means that I release the other person from any debt that I believe they owe me. This is a truly freeing experience and, best of all, it does not require the participation of the other person. So, not only has God revealed why we are to forgive, but He has shown us how. For more information on this topic, check out Jentezen Franklin’s book, Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt.
We must apply what we’ve learned. The next time you or I feel the wrong kind of anger rising up, we should consider these three time-tested, Bible approved strategies. While they may seem simple, the best answers are often just that.
- Walk away from the situation. Like Jesus, we must find some space to calm down and ask God for His perspective about what is triggering us, and whether the anger is purposeful or poisonous.
- Take time to reflect. We must consider what responsibility we each have over the situation, and choose to respond in love instead of reacting in anger, fear and pride.
- Communicate thoughts and feelings. Because our anger can trigger those around us, try using “I” instead of “you” while expressing thoughts and feelings. I love you guys!