Part 2: What is Wrong with Pornography?
Sexual Sin: Separate but Not Equal
According to the United States Constitution, the sixth amendment guarantees a defendant the right to represent himself. In heaven’s court of law, Jesus is our great defender, and as a benefit of his death, burial, and resurrection, we have an outpouring of grace through faith (1 Timothy 1:14), but God’s law still stands (Matthew 5:17), and apart from our surrender to His Lordship, we are left to our own defenses, which will always be insufficient (Romans 6:23).
So, what does this right to self-representation have to do with sexual sin? A lot actually. 1 Samuel 2:26 says, “If one person sins against another, God may mediate for the offender; but if anyone sins against the LORD, who will intercede for them?”
Whether or not we consecrate them as such, every single human body is designed by God as the dwelling place of the His Holy Spirit. This is why the Apostle Paul wrote, “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6: 18-20). In essence, when we sin sexually, we force the Holy Spirit out of His temple and set up within ourselves a false temple of idol worship.
Jesus said, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15). But what if I sin against myself? 1 John 1:9 says, ”If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” Albeit, when it comes to sexual sin, it stands to Biblical reason that I must also forgive myself if I am to be free from condemnation. Self-condemnation is a dangerous snare that can keep us bound to the imprisonment of our own guilt and shame, which is a form of self-righteousness, and therefore idolatry.
Once Saved, Always Saved? I feel like this is an important topic to touch upon when discussing the grace of God. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.” Some might use this out of context as a license to continue a lifestyle of sin. However, Paul addresses this misnomer very clearly when he writes, “You who are trying to be justified by the law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace” (Galations 5:4). We are saved by grace through faith, but if we shift our faith to legalism, we are no longer under the grace which saves us. Whether you have fallen away from grace is between you and God. My point of view is simply this: I must work out my own salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12).
What Is Wrong with Pornography?
It’s time to play Jeopardy!
Here’s the clue: “It’s the most effective way to memorize something or form a new habit.”
Answer: “What is repetition.”
Did you get it? We learn through repetition. Most men are visually stimulated learners. So, when a man scrolls through sexually explicit images for hours at a time, he is learning. He is memorizing. This is a dangerous effect because those images become seared into the hippocampus, located in the brain’s temporal lobe. This is where episodic memories are formed and indexed for later access (1).
What’s wrong with that? The issue arises when men who have a head full of porn try to pursue real relationships with women. They have compiled a mountain of data with which they compare and contrast every prospective partner. This fantasy blueprint often leads men in one of two directions: a hidden addiction and/or a lifestyle of recreational dating. Both lead to the same outcome – loneliness and regret. If you don’t believe me, ask any older gentleman.
When faced with a difficult decision about changing my character or habitual nature, I think of two distinctive and introspective questions that Andy Stanley poses: “Is it worth it? and “Is it working?” If I cannot answer in the affirmative to both of these soul probes, I probably need to change my attitude or direction.
Does this sound familiar? After searching through countless pages of explicit content, only for a few seconds of ecstasy, you are left with a seemingly inexplicable feeling of emptiness. Well, my friend, that feeling of emptiness is the Holy Spirit leaving the building. What I am about to say may ruffle some feathers. If it does, do not deny the conviction. Your heart may be trying to mend. Ready? Regardless of whether you are a man or woman, the expression of self-love through sexual acts is the first concession towards homosexuality. Just let it sink in. If you have a heart after God, it may keep you from rushing into sin next time.
Jesus explained the uncompromising spiritual consequences of sexual sin when He said, “But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). You may be asking, “What should I do when a hot girl walks into the gym?”
Focus, Daniel-san.
On the other hand, recreational dating is like shooting at animals for fun. Just because it is lawful does not make it right. I sincerely support hunters and the art of hunting, but there is a big difference between hunting with purpose and killing to watch something die. Motives matter. Recreational dating is like setting snares and then abandoning the prey to die slowly. David shared from his own experience when he wrote, “In his arrogance the wicked man hunts down the weak, who are caught in the schemes he devises” (Psalm 10:2).
Some things are true whether they are convenient for you to believe in or not: When a man or woman engages in sexual activity with another person, whether physically or virtually, they form a soul-tie (Mark 10:8, 1 Cor. 6:16). The good news is that soul-ties can be broken and you can experience freedom.
The Great Debate
I enjoy a good debate and I am always a good sport – win, lose, or draw. I like when others challenge me with questions for which I do not yet know the answer. It forces me to look beyond myself, see things from a different perspective, learn something new, confirm something that I was otherwise unable to articulate beforehand, and share my discovery with others.
There are many things about which one can argue. However, it is impossible to argue against someone’s personal experience. You can choose to believe them or not, but against an honest personal experience, there is no argument. That’s what makes the Holy Spirit so wonderful – He wants to be experienced. He wants to reveal Himself to us through His matchless presence until there is no question about whether He is real. Here are several ways the Holy Spirit reveals Himself to us, according to scripture:
- “The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children” (Romans 8:16).
- The Spirit reveals His desires and leads us in paths of righteousness (Psalm 23, Romans 8:4-16; Galatians 5:16-25).
- The Spirit bestows supernatural gifts that manifest His presence (1 Cor. 12:7-11).
- The Spirit accomplishes miraculous signs and wonders in and through our lives, all according to His will (Heb. 2:4; 1 Cor. 2:4; Rom. 15:19).
Often, it takes a measure of faith to believe God exists before He reveals Himself in an experiential way. But after we are fully persuaded by and through the gift of His presence, we no longer need faith to believe He is real, but rather our faith grows in such a way that we become active participants in His miraculous ministry through us, His children and heirs to His glorious Kingdom.
The Climax
A dream can be a powerful thing. It can change the way we see and interact with the world around us. I would like to share with you a dream I experienced that forever changed the way I think about sex. Whether or not you believe or receive anything from my experience is up to you. All I know is that it changed me in a profound way, and for that reason, I feel impressed to share it with you.
In my dream, I was on an assigned mission for which I was uniquely qualified. I was accompanied by an experienced older mentor. He and I were traveling very quickly through a great expanse of darkness as far as the eye could see. However, the light within us shone brightly all around us. Suddenly, we both stopped mid-flight and simultaneously turned to a specific direction behind us. Although neither of us ever spoke a word, I knew and heard in my spirit, “The Lord is about to speak.” Just then, a tiny glimmer of light appeared in the endless distance and my body, spirit, and soul leapt with excitement as a voice began speak.
The light swelled into a shockwave, completely filling the expanse in every direction. As the perimeter of the wave passed over us, we were caught up and engulfed within. It permeated me throughout and I felt overwhelming peace and joy that I cannot describe in words. It was exponentially more fulfilling than any drug or sexual experience. It was the love of the Lord.
The voice of the Lord spoke in a language I could not comprehend, but I experienced its meaning. He was repeating over and over to all of His creation, “I love you. I love. I love you.”
When I woke up the next morning, my perspective had forever been changed, specifically on the topic of pleasure. Things that used to stimulate and fulfill me, like sex and food had lost some of their luster because I knew I had experienced a glimpse of the endless love of God in a wholly new way (1 Cor. 2:9, 13:12).
I used to think that I had experienced some of life’s greatest pleasures. They do not even hold a candle to the pleasures we will experience here on earth as we fulfill the great commission of Jesus, and in heaven when we meet Him face to face in the fullness of His glory. As David wrote in Psalm 16:11, “You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
The Three-Fold Ministry of Jesus
The gospels harmoniously portray the three-fold ministry of Jesus as teaching, healing, and deliverance. But one of these things is not like the others. Let’s take a closer look at these three areas of ministry and examine why one is so different, so necessary, and so lacking in the church today.
Teaching requires discipline and knowledge. A good teacher is gifted to accumulate and consolidate an array of information and then organize and present that information in a memorable and engaging way. A great teacher is gifted to accomplish all these things while inspiring other to act upon them. A Godly teacher knows how to use their gift in partnership with the Holy Spirit and considers eternity because he or she has developed the kind of wisdom and understanding that only comes through personal consecration unto the Lord.
Teachers are important to the body of Christ because, “faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Romans 10:17). Teaching is the central theme for The Great Commission.
I am thankful that the modern church has an abundance of Biblical teaching, but just because the teaching is sound in doctrine does not mean the mouthpiece is clean. As we have seen throughout history, great teachers can appear to be a holy grail of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, and yet remain spiritually filthy on the inside.
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal” (1 Corinthians 13:1).
Healing requires united faith in action. Miraculous healings are exciting to witness. They are a manifestation of the tangible power of God at work through supernaturally restoring the physical body. In scripture, we often see that healing miracles require united faith in action between an intercessor with the gift of healing and a willing participant. Sometimes, the willing participant can be proxy for the one in need of miraculous healing (Luke 7:1-10).
The gift of healing is important to the body of Christ. Witnessing or participating in a healing miracle can be one of the most profound faith-building experiences. However, miraculous healings can also be promoted as glamorized entertainment, and therefore tend to draw large crowds of spectators.
As we have seen throughout history, individuals who have been given the gift of healing are often tempted to use their gifting as a weapon of self-righteousness. The power to heal brings fame and glory, but that prestige belongs solely to Jesus, whose Holy Spirit empowers us to be active faith participants and recipients of His miraculous healing power. Without Him, miraculous healings are a charade of witchcraft, in which a cauldron of curses is bedazzled and masked as a jeweled chalice filled with the fountain of youth. Those who drink from it discover it is a goblet of fire.
“If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing” (1 Corinthians 13:2).
Deliverance requires surrender and self-sacrifice. Unlike the ministries of teaching and healing, deliverance has no glamor or fame. In fact, it is often ugly and painful. Most importantly, we all need deliverance, which is why Jesus included it in The Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:13). To be delivered from spiritual oppression requires strict examination of the condition of my body, soul, and spirit against the perfect measuring rod of correction which is the eternal Word of God. It is a daily surrender and a constant sanctification process. As the Lord instructed Moses, “Little by Little I will drive them out before you, until you have increased enough to take possession of the land” (Exodus 23:30).
Deliverance is yielding myself to the Holy Spirit as He breaks off or cuts away anything that is dead in my life. Like a vine-dresser prunes his crop, so the Lord carefully protects His children from stagnation, disease, and death. When I lean into His pruning process, allowing Him to reveal unproductive or counterproductive parts of my life, I become an active participant in sanctification. In doing so, the Lord often reveals His will for me in the process, preparing me to bear exponentially more fruit and in turn, share it with others.
It is important to note that blood-bought believers cannot be possessed by demons. However, we can experience demonic oppression. In order for someone to be delivered from demonic possession, they must first receive the free gift of salvation through Jesus Christ (Romans 10:9-10). The reason for this is found in Matthew 6:24 which say, “No one can serve two masters.” Exceptions to this spiritual principle of deliverance from demonic possession include those who are mentally ill or otherwise incapacitated. In these cases, we have the authority to dispel demonic strongholds over those who are physiologically unable.
So, how do you experience deliverance? The same way you learn to do anything – applying fundamental principles through practice. The Bible is clear about the all-encompassing power and authority we have over the spirit of Satan. James specifies this authority in the simplest of terms when he writes, “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you” (James 4:7).
If you are interested in experiencing deliverance from spiritual oppression, here are some practical steps you can take:
- Practice forgiveness (Matthew 6:14-15). Many times, when Christians are tormented by evil spirits, the root can be traced back to unforgiveness (Matthew 18:21-35, Romans 12:14–21).
- Ask the Lord to introduce you to a Spirit-filled apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor, or teacher who has the spiritual covering of a congregation and who operates in the gift of deliverance (Ephesians 4:11).
- Get water baptized as a public profession of your faith in Christ (1 Peter 3:21).
- Ask the Lord to baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire (Acts 2).
- Declare the Biblical promises of God over your life.
Squatters Rights
I once knew a man who allowed some of his friends to temporarily move into his house. He could afford to let them live there rent-free, so he never had them sign a leasing agreement. He continued to let his friends live there even as he moved into a second home. Years went by and he decided to liquidate the home as an investment property. However, he was unable to sell the home because of a law called Adverse Possession, commonly referred to as “squatters rights.” It took him over a year to evict his “friends,” but not before they trashed the home. They punched holes in almost every wall, broke fireplaces, and let dogs defecate on the floors. The damage was so extensive that the owner forfeited the home rather than invest in the repairs.
Good intentions without the guidance of the Spirit of truth can often lead to bad consequences. Henry G. Bohn coined the phrase, “the road to hell is paved with good intentions” but the sentiment predates him all the way back to King Solomon, who wrote,
“There is a pathway that seems right to a man, but in the end it’s a road to death” (Proverbs 14:12).
Peter had good intentions when he tried to protect Jesus from the cross, but Jesus identified the spirit of Satan operating through him. Remember, we all need deliverance and Christians are targets for oppressive spirits. So, we must be spiritually on guard. We must not allow the enemy to possess or oppress our dwelling place. Silence is consent.
The Stockholm Syndrome
In 1973, the world watched as four hostages were taken captive during a bank robbery in Stockholm, Sweden. The strangest part about the heist was what happened after it was over. During the 6 day heist, the hostages developed a psychological alliance with their captors. Once released, they refused to testify against the bank robbers in court. This phenomena became known as Stockholm Syndrome.
This is a spiritual condition that affects more than just victims under physical duress. If we allow the spirit of Jezebel legal residency in our hearts and homes, we may develop unhealthy dependencies and confuse love with lust. Remember the words of Jesus: “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly” (John 10:10).
I once had the privilege of spending a great deal of quality time with Bishop Dale Carnegie Bronner. It was a remarkable Kingdom connection where I had intimate access to him daily. I did not realize that I was being mentored until after the season was over. In fact, I did not even know who he was until later in our friendship. I just new him as Dale. He made a lifelong impact on me without ever taking any personal credit. One of the many things he shared with me applies to the Stockholm Syndrome. He said, “People do not change until they hate their sin.”
There have been times when I was half-way through a movie or tv show and heard the voice of the Holy Spirit telling me to turn it off. If I obey, He always rewards me with better things and strengthens my character and convictions. However, if I say, “I need to know how it ends; I can handle it.” I always end up regretting the consequences.
The same spirit of Jezebel who entices us to choose sin, an act of separation, is the same one who makes us feel guilty for it. It is a false sense of security. This is the irrational pattern that occurs with victims of Stockholm Syndrome and the same pattern that occurs if we stop resisting the constricting and poisonous grip of the enemy. Jesus said, “I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you” (Luke 10:19).
How to Catch a Monkey
If you are still with me, but are not yet persuaded, I will share an analogy that forever changed my perspective about the snares of sexual sin and pornography.
If you have ever tried to train an animal, you know that with intelligence often comes a degree of stubbornness. As far as intelligence goes, primates are considered to have the highest rank within the animal kingdom. However, they are also some of the easiest to capture in the wild. Surprisingly, the ancient hunting technique has not changed much over the course of history. Here is the method:
- Hollow out a coconut with a hole just large enough for your target monkey to squeeze his hand inside.
- Tether the coconut to a nearby tree or another anchor point.
- Put some delicious fruit inside the coconut.
- Hide and wait.
It will not be long before your target monkey comes to examine the free food. You can be sure he was watching you put it there. When the monkey squeezes his hand into the coconut to grasp the fruit, his fist becomes too large to pull his hand back through the small hole. I have watched countless videos about this, and it happens the same way every time. While the monkey is screaming and tugging, the hunter simply walks up and puts the monkey in a bag. The monkey refuses to let go of the fruit, even at the cost of a life of slavery.
When I first heard about this, my mind was blown when I realized that I could be just as stubborn as the monkey. The Apostle Peter warns us, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). The enemy is always looking for an easy target and he lays traps and snares in his wake. However, the Lord answers our prayers when we put His Word to work and start praying like David, who said, “Let the wicked fall into their own nets, while I pass by in safety” (Psalm 141:10). If I ignore the warning signs or fail to prepare my heart and mind for spiritual resistance, I could find myself in a monkey trap. The root of this stubbornness is always pride. I must release my grip if I want to be free from the bondage of self-righteousness. My encouragement to you is to remember the monkey trap and just let go. The freedom you will experience will make it easy to breathe again.
CITATIONS
Part 3: Strategies of Spiritual Warfare
