Over the years, I have counseled many men who gained the courage to confront and defy disparaging giants. I would like to share some of the proven strategies I have learned to overcome the spirit of Jezebel.

Repent – Revival only comes through repentance, which is why the Lord instructed King Solomon, “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land” (2 Chronicles 7:14).

Choose Your Friends Wisely – “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14). “Therefore, ‘Come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you’” (2 Corinthians 6:17).

The Apostle Paul was quoting the Greek poet and dramatist Menander when he wrote, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character’” (1 Corinthians 15:33). The spirit of Jezebel is a devouring spirit that will keep you from being productive. Stay away from people who would persuade you to compromise with your convictions, even if it is a family member. Love is patient and kind. Love hopes and endures. Love never fails. But sometimes, it is only appropriate to love from a distance.

Jesus said, “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” (Matthew 10:34-39).

Take Responsibility: The Spirit of Adolescence – The modern concept of adolescence is relatively new to society. Historically, adolescence was defined by the onset of puberty. However, the spirit of adolescence has redefined the limits of childlike behavior and with it, a rampant sense of entitlement, regardless of age. The spirit of adolescence can be defined as claiming all the rights and privileges of adulthood without assuming any of the responsibilities. Today, like never before, we are seeing adults of all ages being seduced by this seductive spirit. Jesus commands us to take responsibility for our own thoughts and actions (2 Corinthians 10:5). Most men never mature emotionally past the age of accountability. Being a man requires emotional maturity, self-control, and discipline. Here are some scriptural references that make me want to grow up.

“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things” (1 Corinthians 13: 11).

“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24).

“When tempted, no one should say, ‘God is tempting me.’ For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death” (James 1:13-15).

Clean House – Start with things you know you should not have. Show the Lord you are serious. Then, ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you anything else in your house, car, locker, or workplace that is hindering you from experiencing His favor. Take time to listen. He may be telling you to remove things that seem unrelated, like articles of clothing, bags, art, books, etc. Trust Him. Objects can carry demonic spiritual attachments. This is a subtle way that the enemy gains legal access to our home without us even knowing it. That is why we must ask for discernment. Some things can be anointed and prayed over, but if God told you to get rid of it, throw it away. It may be an idol. You cannot consecrate an idol unto the Lord. These things can sometimes be the most difficult to surrender. Do it anyway, and quickly. Do not hesitate to act when the Lord has given you an instruction. His Word promises that He will bless you for your obedience (Deuteronomy 28).

H.A.L.T.: Identify Your Triggers

Most of our emotional triggers fall into one of these 4 categories:

• Hunger– If you have ever been “hangry” then you know what I am talking about. However, with practice we can emulate the Apostle Paul who wrote, “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” (Philippians 4:11-13). Now, whenever I feel hungry, I think about Paul writing that in prison. I also think about a lesson that I learned from Pastor Franklin. My stomach is not my king and therefore, I will not be ruled by it. I now understand hunger as an opportunity to give God more of myself through reading and speaking His Word, prayer, intercession, praise, and worship. When the Lord invites me to dinner and I show up hungry, He always meets me at the door, places me in a seat of authority, and fills me with good things.
• Anger – Anger is a God-given emotion. There is nothing wrong with feeling angry unless we misuse it as a weapon. Ephesians 4:26 says, “’Be angry, and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down on your wrath.” Prolonged anger comes from ineffective self-righteousness, which is trying to be righteous on my own, apart from God, and not getting the results I want. This often results in depression and addiction. Using pornography, which affects the brain like an addictive drug, is a form of self-medicating.
• Loneliness – Jesus gives us a wonderful promise throughout scripture: “Never will I leave you or forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6, Hebrews 13:5). When I allow the Holy Spirit to fill my heart, I never feel alone, even when I am by myself. “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1). If you feel lonely, spend some time with Jesus. He will never disappoint.
• Exhaustion – This is a good one for me. I have never made a wise decision after midnight. If I feel physical or emotional exhaustion, I become a much easier target for the enemy. The battlefield of our souls is in the mind, so I must be alert if I am to exercise my position of authority in Christ. Our blessed assurance is that,
  • In our weakness, He is strong. “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” (2 Corinthians 12:9). It is a sign of spiritual maturity to have a healthy awareness of our weaknesses.
  • In Him we find rest. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).

Look for the EXIT – God will always provide an EXIT. However, we must be willing to look for it and then take actionable steps toward and through that exit. He will reward you for your obedience. If you feel tempted to sin, look for the EXIT. If you are caught up in sin and feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit, look for the EXIT. Stop what you are doing and look for the EXIT. His Word promises us that, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it” (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Burn Your Bridges – Delete the pathways to your vice. For some, that could means deleting an app, phone number, or friend from your phone. For others, it means moving the location of your computer. Only you know what this means for you and how to do it. You may have been incredibly clever and gone to great lengths to hide things. Use that same creativity to protect yourself from yourself. The Bible tells us, “Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, But the LORD weighs the hearts” (Proverbs 21:2).

Music Motivates – Music has a profound effect on our conscience. It can bring us closer to God or callous us to His voice. There is a spiritual force behind every measure of music. When I was younger, the only way to listen to new music was on the radio or to buy the CD. I had a massive collection of music CDs, few of which were praise and worship. My youth group pastor would occasionally host a bonfire ceremony wherein he would invite anyone who wanted freedom from addictions, hindrances, bondages, or other spiritual oppressions to bring their paraphernalia to the event and throw it all into the fire. I threw away thousands of dollars worth of music, more than once. Whenever I ignored the voice of the Lord, I sunk deeper into depression. It is like refusing to wash your favorite shirt, and yet wearing it every day. Everyone else can see and smell how gross it is except you. Yet, you continue to wear it because it is comfortable. However, each time I responded in obedience to His calling, and rid myself of the spiritual chains that bind, He promoted me in every area of my life and supplied all of my needs.

Does that mean I have to get rid of ALL secular music? Good question. That is between you and God. There are times in my life when I only listen to Christian music. However, there are some secular music selections that I enjoy listening to that do not hinder my relationship with the Lord. For example, my wife makes fun of me because she sometimes catches me listening to Bach on the harpsichord. It sooths my soul and makes me feel thankful. I also enjoy listening to instrumental dance music when I am working out. The key is whether I am free to praise and worship to the music. If it does not pass that test, it has no place in my life.

Take a Break from TV – It has been scientifically proven that our brains are more active while we sleep than when we are watching television. In fact, there are few activities that require less brain activity than TV. If we are not careful, we can subject ourselves to hypnotic states, gorging ourselves on graphic images and language that desensitize us to the voice of the Holy Spirit. Philippians 4:8 encourages us, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

Forgive Yourself – Self-condemnation is a prison of our own device. Sometimes, forgiving myself seems harder than forgiving others. However, this is a dangerous form of idolatry. If I condemn myself, I exalt myself as a righteous judge and deny my identity in Christ. In John chapter 8, some Pharisees caught a woman in the act of adultery. If the allegations were true, either the Pharisees were watching porn or it was a setup. Regardless, Jesus continues to teach us an important lesson through her shame. As the crowd was ready to stone her, Jesus said “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to cast a stone at her” (8:7). From oldest to youngest, her accusers walked away, and Jesus concluded the matter by addressing the woman, “Then neither do I condemn you. Now go and sin no more” (8:11).

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore glorify God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19). Part of receiving forgiveness is forgiving myself and forsaking the sin. If God no longer condemns me, then who am I to condemn myself?

Make a Covenant with Your Eyes – The Psalmist wrote, “I will set nothing wicked before my eyes; I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me” (Psalm 101:3). Have you ever wondered why Jewish religious leaders always wear tassels on their garments? The tassels are a memorial to a covenant with the eyes. Numbers 15:39 says, “You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the Lord, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by chasing after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes.” They wear the tassels to refocus their attention on the Lord when temptation comes. Most of us do not wear tassels, but the principle still works. When temptation comes, look away. It gets easier with practice. When I was battling the temptation of wandering eyes, I asked the Lord to make me feel sick for looking at women with lust. He answered my prayer and now whenever I entertain lustful thoughts, I feel like throwing up.

The Apostle Paul said it best, “I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize” (1 Corinthians 9:27). Do not beat yourself up if a beautiful woman catches your eye. Beat yourself up if you start undressing her with your eyes. I beat myself up before I give the devil a chance. Remember, God wants to make you stronger and full of integrity. The devil wants to humiliate and paralyze you with shame and fear. Create a memorial for yourself as a reminder of the promise.

Develop a New Appetite – Recent studies prove that fast food causes the human body to produce unique enzymes that only break down fast food. Once a new colony of enzymes is established in the body, those enzymes make you feel hunger cravings for the very food for which they exist. The crazy part about it all is that fast food has no real nutritional value. Most fast food items are considered “food products” which means they are not real food. In fact, studies have shown that fast food does more harm than good to the body. Still, people line up to satisfy cravings for counterfeit food with no nutritional value.

The same is true of the appetite that can be developed for pornography. It is a counterfeit to intimacy and does more harm than good to relationships. It takes consistency to develop an addiction. It takes consistency to break one. 

She Does Not Belong to You – If you are still looking for a way to apply a new perspective to break an old habit, consider this: The girl you are objectifying already belongs to someone, and it is not you. So, by engaging with her sexually, even remotely or virtually, a covenant is broken, regardless of her participation. As the assailant, your best-case scenario for accusation would be a sexual pervert and thief. The worst-case scenario would be a kidnapping rapist. It makes me wonder if the high court of heaven has a registered sex offender list.

Make a Prayer Closet – For me, this is literally the closet in my bedroom. For others, this could be a spare bedroom, a rooftop, or a quiet place in the woods. The purpose of a prayer closet is found in Matthew 6:6 when Jesus instructed his disciples how to pray. He said, “But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” A prayer closet is a secret meeting place for you and the Lord. It’s a place without distractions where you can pray and listen to the Holy Spirit. My prayer closet is one of the most important parts of my daily walk with Jesus. I close out all distractions, get down on my knees, and humble myself before the Lord. I often start with THE ACTS PRAYER MODEL. It is there in the secret meeting place that the Holy Spirit fills me with power, anointing, favor and wisdom. In His presence there is fullness of joy, at His right hand are pleasures forevermore (Psalm 16:11).